Considering Pre-Marital Counseling

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

 I'm sure some of you think pre-marital counseling is something that is forced upon you by the church or other groups, but, I actually get a lot of requests for information on premarital counselors, the benefits of, the time commitment, etc. Since, I'm not a therapist and would never claim to be, I did ask one of my favorite therapists, Will Baum, to give us a bit of insight for all of you considering some counseling sessions before the big day. Here's what Will had to say...

As this blog attests, preparing for a wedding can be an amazing, overwhelming swirl of details.  Friends, family, fashion, flowers--it's easy to lose sight of what the whole thing was about in the first place:  The two of you, getting married.  (Congratulations, by the way.)

You're likely have countless questions about how to shape a wedding exactly the way you picture it.  Beth and this blog are full of answers.  I'd like to encourage you to make time to consider another set of questions.  These questions can also be overwhelming--and may feel unwanted at the moment--but they're important.  They're about being married once you've made it past the big day.  As a bonus, answering them may also smooth the ride through the sometimes bumpy ramp up to "I do."

Among these questions:  What are the areas where you and your spouse-to-be sync up most?  When do the two of you tend to disagree?  What happens when you don't see eye-to-eye?  How do you deal with disagreements in a way that helps maintain and build your respect and affection for each other?  

Getting a clearer sense today of potentially tricky areas--and how to handle them--can help head-off surprise and confusion down the line, leaving you with an even stronger foundation for your marriage.  

As you talk over hot-button topics (children, money, sex, family, religion), it makes good sense to have an impartial third party to act as guide and, if needed, as referee.  Who best?  Maybe your officiant or other clergy.  For many, it's a therapist.  Regardless of who you see for pre-marital counseling, the plan and hope is that after just a handful of sessions, you'll feel even more excited and deeply connected as couple.  A very nice way to be come vow-time.


Will Baum, LCSW does pre-marital counseling at offices in Beverly Hills and Silver Lake.  Contact him at (323) 610-0112 or through his website, 

With all of this, if any of you are searching for marital counseling and live in the Southern California area, consider checking Will out. He's the best of the best and can help you prepare for married life as well as work through any pre-marital jitters you might be having!


Beverley Hills Therapist said...

I think pre-marital counselling is quite an interesting concept, I wonder if it changes your thoughts and feelings for better or worse!

Nicole-Lynn said...

Great advice. We took a 13 week course and loved it. A lot of couples go into their marriages with blinders on... not aware of their financial situations, how many kids they want, how they will parent, leaving their parents fully and cleaving to their spouses, etc. There are so many topics that pre marital counseling covers. I highly recommend! :)